The Rules For A First Kiss

We’re all in for a tough little time here.  The first kiss.  Shit man.  No matter how old you are, it probably makes you really nervous.  That’s okay, it really does happen to all of us.  She’s probably cute.  She’s cute right?  Good.  I’m glad to hear it.  I guess we need to discuss this a tiny bit before you go jumping into it.  You don’t want the first kiss to be weird or awkward.

Okay, does she like you?  That’s the first question.  You need to know that she’s down before you go trying to kiss her mouth or anything.  If you’re even thinking about kissing her then it means that there’s a little bit of chemistry.  At least I fricking hope so.  The thing is, you need to identify whether or not you have a “like you, like you” chemistry.  She might think of you as only a friend, which could lead to some weird problems in the case of you smooching her.  But, with a little luck she’s a go and you can move into the next segment of the process, which is the execution.

Do you do it at the end of the night?  The second date?  Damn, it’s hard to tell.  I think one of the best first kisses of all time, in any movie anyway, would be the Woody Allen and Diane Keaton kiss from the classic, Academy Award winning film, Annie Hall.  It’s early in the night and Woody is walking Diane home and he pulls her aside and just says “can we kiss?” and then kisses her.  He explains that it prevents all the awkward stuff that goes along with a kiss at the end of the night.  It’s an interesting tactic.  You might want to try it!  However if you’re like the rest of us, you probably want to try a little more conventional approach.

The best and most normal way to kiss a girl for the first time would be at the very end of the night.  You drop her off.  You get out of the car and open her door for her.  Walk her up to her door and then kiss her goodnight.  How cute!

I, personally, appreciate the wild and interesting approach.  Maybe you guys will just start making out over dinner or something.  Who knows?  Get weird with it.  Who cares!  It’s going to be fun and memorable either way.  The rules for a first kiss?  Hell, make them up.


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