Meeting Her Parents: Tips For Not Being An Ass

The thought of meeting her parents may fill you with terror, but if you respect your girl and treat her well, there is no reason her parents will act indifferent. Fathers are often the worst of the parents since they may always view their girl as innocent and they only want the best for her.  Mothers are also a powerful ally in your girlfriend’s life and you should aim to get in her good books.

Just like you wouldn’t go to a job interview without researching the company beforehand, you must also quiz your girlfriend to find out if her parents have a good sense of humor or are reserved, since there is no point in cracking a joke or two if they are over serious. Other important questions to ask her include,  do you have siblings, are her grandparents alive, and how long her parents have been married?. When you meet her parents you have something mature to discuss. This proves to her parents that you are displaying interest in your girlfriend’s personal life.

If your girlfriend gets on great with her mother, you should be making an effort to get to know her better. If she likes you then she can persuade her husband to feel the same way. Fathers, on the other hand, like to protect their daughter and he may be disappointed that she now approaches you with a problem instead of him, but if you can gain his trust this can go a long way to maintaining a great relationship with her parents. If your girlfriend has a strong relationship with her father, you should aim for the same. This doesn’t mean you have to take up fishing or even discuss your family life with him, but if you care about your partner, you should be making the effort to get on with her parents.

  • Take a Gift: If your girlfriend has invited you for Thanksgiving dinner, make sure you take a gift. Safe options include a bottle of wine, box of chocolates, or a floral arrangement, but ask your partner for feedback beforehand.
  • Conversation: Meeting the parents can put a lump in the throat of the most confident of men, but if you know her father is a golfer maybe you could start up a conversation along those lines. If your partner’s parents have a dog and you’ve had a lifelong friend, this could be a great topic to discuss. Family history, job, sports, or movies are great subjects. Avoid discussing politics (unless her parents love a good gossip), jokes (unless they have a sense of humor), religion, finances, or personal questions.
  • Compliments: if you like the look of her parent’s home, state exactly that. If you love her mother’s cooking, tell her, and she will probably want to invite you around more often. If her mother looks good for her age, flatter her without over exaggeration.

Meeting her parents isn’t the most tragic of events, especially if you research and plan beforehand. Good conversation will go a long way into her parent’s accepting you into the family, but try being yourself and they’ll sense you’re genuine and trustworthy. Remember, they only want the best for their daughter.


Leave a Reply