How to Get Her to Get Along with Your Mom

If you have a mom who is strong headed, controlling and somewhat insane here are a few pointers when your woman steps into the picture. How to get her to get along with your mom takes some wrangling but, if done right, could save you years of hell if you end up marrying this babe.

The Meet-n-Greet

Wait as long as you can before she meets your mom. Look for similarities between the two which will go a long way once they meet. If there are none, then be sure and inform her on what your mom enjoys so she can get an idea of what the fuck to talk to her about.

The Prep

Once you are ready to bring her into the hornet’s nest you will have to prep her as if she is going into a prize fight. Overbearing mothers can be cunning to the point of putting the quash on your relationship before it gets started.

• Let her know every quirk and/or annoying quality your mom has so there are no curve balls.

• Explain right down to the specifics on how to greet your mom so as not to threaten her. Is it a hug, handshake or kiss on the cheek that is appropriate?

• Tell her what to wear. If your mom is a savvy shopper, have your woman dress up a bit, if your mom is a down-to-earth country bumpkin, have her keep it simple.

• Give her conversation pointers, religious beliefs, etc. telling her what to steer clear from and what is fair game.

• Use physical signs you may want to agree upon just like a baseball coach to a base runner. If she gets cornered, a simply finger on the chin could be your signal to extract her from the enemy.

Never Abandon

The biggest pitfall a guy can make when bringing around a girl for the first time is being side blinded. It goes like this:

1. You arrive.
2. Your mom is on her best behavior.
3. You get comfortable and start messing around with your brothers, sisters, nephews, whatever.
4. She gets cornered by your mom.
5. Your mom pounces, insults her and the beginning becomes the end.

Never leave her alone with your mom early on. She may seem tough, but when stories of old girlfriends, how you don’t really like blondes or the time she caught you jacking in the basement to lingerie ads come out you might as well set your hair on fire.

How to get her to get along with your mom is essential from day one. Let your woman (potential wife) know she is number one and keep your mom in her place by taking her out to lunch once in a while, alone. Hopefully, if all goes well in the beginning, smooth sailing will follow.

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6 Rude Halloween Costume Ideas

This Halloween get it together and be the talk of the party with one of these 6 Rude Halloween Costumes Ideas. Don’t wear a boring superhero, doctor or cop costume but instead make the most unusual, politically incorrect statement of “I Don’t Give a Shit”. It only comes once a year and if you spend most of your days tucked into a business suit or other mindless work thread, let your freak flag fly for once.

Woody Skeleton

Get yourself an entire skeleton outfit and rig it up your way by adding a skeleton woody. Cut a rectangular 9” swatch of black tablecloth, bed sheet, old shirt or felt and glue it to your costume crotch. Then cut a piece of white material in a bone shape with a separate ‘tip’ bone on the end and glue it on the black. Instant woody skeleton.

Get Cocky

Search around for a small toy rooster, hang it out of your zipper or top of your pants and, as you stroke its head tell everyone you are feeling a little cocky.

SNL Favorite

Most people have seen the Saturday Night Live Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake ‘Dick in a Box’ video. If you haven’t, tube it now. The costume is you dressed in a nice suit with a bow wrapped box attached to your crotch. This can easily be rigged by running a belt through cut slots in the back of the box and tying your belt on the side. Some ladies may want to open your present so if you dare, actually drop your junk through a hole in the back and make sure the top of the box can be removed.

Hot Holy Shit

Get enough brown felt or other material to cover your body (a good improvisation is a brown paper lawn bag with a hole cut out for your brain pan). Glue, paint and/or draw rising flames from the bottom. Add a brown cap and you my friend are Hot Shit. Go further and instead of the flames, cut holes in the material, put on a priest collar and guess what? You are Holy Shit.

Hands On

Find a picture or toy box cutout of animals big enough to cover your crotch. Even better, score a pair of farm animal patterned boxers. Sew, glue or string the picture to your jeans and if you found boxers wear only them with sneakers and a t-shirt or put them over your jeans. You now have an official petting zoo for all to try. Add a message on your t-shirt that says ‘Petting Zoo’ Females Pet Free.

Go Insane

Similar to ‘Dick in a Box’ but instead, the empty box or container attached to your crotch is from peanuts (or any other kind). Your costume is that you are fucking nuts.

Use one of these 6 Rude Halloween Costume Ideas and laugh at all the hilarious, horrified reactions while you become inebriated and act even ruder than your costume.

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Sploshing: Cream Her Panties With Food Play

The sploshing fetish may not be as popular as the stocking and suspenders or foot fetish, but it is perfect for fun-loving couples who want to take sex to the extremes. Sploshing engages all of the senses. It’s not perfect sex, although it can feel that way as your inhibitions disappear and you’re slipping and sliding to frantic orgasms. Covering the body in sticky or slimy substances to achieve arousal is the basis of sploshing.

Sploshing fanatics love to use food during foreplay. On the other hand, some people don’t feel a sexual arousal toward messy food play, but each to their own. Sploshing is another name for Wet and Messy (WAM), and there is a British magazine dedicated to the art of sploshing named Splosh.

One such reason why it is popular is because it is harmless fun. It mimics the sexual fluids that are released during sex. That squelching sound as a dick slips into a moist pussy is pretty much the all over feeling as the food applied to a partner squelches with him or her. Custard, cream, cake batter, angel delight, ice cream, honey, treacle, trifle, cream pies are tasty and appealing to use during foreplay.

Some couples like to get wet and messy wearing clothes, or naked. Although the WAM fetish covers all messy substances, it does not include the bodily fluids of semen, urine, vomit or feces.

If you’ve never before tried sploshing, it doesn’t have to get too messy. You could use ice cream or other edible treats on a partner’s anatomy and lick it off. Make it an excuse to burn off the calories with a hot sex session. Sploshing may not be as mainstream as golden showers, but it has featured in some popular TV shows, including Secret Diary of a Call Girl, the Graham Norton Show, and CSI New York.

Sploshing can get as messy as you want it to, so either buy some plastic sheets, especially if you plan to have fun away from the bathroom, or use the bath tub to experiment.

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iPhone5: Is it All It’s Cracked Up to Be?

When Steve Jobs kicked, Apple had some big shoes to fill. Stockholders became jittery and the scramble to keep the cash cow going was thrust into full gear. The iPhone 4S hit the market shortly after and like wide eyed sheep the masses turned out with high expectations. Recently, in fact less than a year later, the iPhone 5 has emerged amidst scattered fanfare with the same ‘moth to the flame’ results.

The Weight

Coming in at an impressive 20% lighter than the 4S (3.95 ounces from 4.9) picking it up is the real test. It can be compared to your first, soft, pink nippled tittie feel as this model sits in your hand (and pocket) like a cloud.

Height and Screen

It stands 4.87 inches from the 4S 4.5 and has a 4 inch, 1136 x 640 resolution screen compared to the prior 3.5 inch, 960 x 640. Apple could have gone with a larger screen but they claim that they want to remain ‘thumb friendly’ enabling the user to still be able to control the device with one hand if need be.

Strength

Yup, Apple claims this new glass is 50% stronger than prior designs that, after one mishap, turned into a shattered mess. The exterior plastic is also touted as being more durable especially when you throw it at your television during a Jets game.

Battery

Another tall claim here stating more talk and browse time. 2 hours more on network and 1 hour more on Wi-Fi. Plus standby time goes from 220 to 225 hours.

In Depth Accessory Change and Location

Here is where you are going to be pissed off if you are a prior Apple phone user. All old iPhone attachments are now null and void to make way for the new Lightning technology. This works on a small light connection nub rather than the cumbersome 30-pin wide connector. It can be attached either way connecting with a firmer hold and allowing the phone to be that much thinner because of it at .30 inches depth compared to .37. Plus, they moved the headphone adaptor to the bottom making for a somewhat cumbersome ride especially when viewing something in landscape mode. It also works on a Nano-Sim card, not a Micro so once again not compatible with other designs. The camera stays the same with 8 megapixels although the iSight has moved to the middle and the Home button made more palpable for easy access.

Overall, the iPhone 5 is a better design, able to run on 4G (it has an A6 chip to the 4S A5) and a bigger bolder display. The 4S did receive an App update that basically gives you everything the 5 has without the bigger, faster bells and whistles. The price is the same so all is good if you feel like upgrading but if you want to cheap out you can score a 4S now for $99 and a 4 for free.

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Blinky Politics: How One Study Claims Election Prediction

Did you ever see or talk to someone that seems to blink more than usual? It may happen to you when a tight booty, big tittie sweetie saunters by and you blink like a cartoon character but some people do it for other reasons, namely nerves. Boston College psycho-physiologist Joseph Tecce studies political body language and when it comes to winning debates he claims that the candidate who blinks the most has lost every election since 1980, with the exception of one. George W. Bush won the presidency regardless of his blinky politics during the 2000 campaign,  however, surprisingly he did lose the popular vote which backed Tecce’s theory.

Blinking Red Flag

According to Professor Tecce (pronounced Tetch just in case you give a shit) in 2008 during the general election, McCain blinked 104 times per minute to Obama’s 62. Obama’s win perpetuated this theory based on how we instinctively react to stress through blinking. Rarely does someone know they are doing it and when witnessed, the observer also instinctively, yet subconsciously, feels as though something is wrong. In the case of politics, when people are trying to figure out the best candidate to steer their country, especially and most importantly in times of crisis, he or she who blinks the most send signals of weakness.

No Weight but Still Effective

If someone blinks more than usual it does not necessarily mean that they are less capable at their job it just may mean, well, they blink more than the other guy. However, it has long been a standing theory that the deep recesses of the brain emit ‘tells’, just like in poker, which are difficult to quell. Tecce says that regardless, in an election situation an audience seems to be consistent with their voting history as negatively reacting to the unnerving blinking. At the same time that very candidate may simply be under extreme distress due to trailing in the polls. Overall, people do not like shifty eyes and if blinking accompanies that cliché, politicians and speakers alike may want to take note.

Current Blinkies

Blinking results from the first 2012 Presidential debate have not been released although the debate itself seems to have swung in Romney’s favor (due to Obama basically phoning it in). Regardless, the numbers from both candidates’ convention speeches according to Tecce find Romney at 33 and Obama at 41 blinks per minute. Like golf, the less you have the more you win and therefore many candidates report being coached on blinking less in addition to being aware of threatening or misconceived body language. All it takes is one tiny misstep and bye-bye presidency.

Although, still only a theory, blinky politics continues to display positive evidence that may one day turn blinking speculation into blinking science. With two more Presidential debates on the schedule take a look at blinking patterns for yourself. See if you can decipher your own judgment beside the fact that the challenger is wearing special religious secret power underwear.

 

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Why She Might Be Mad At You

As a woman, I know that we are hard to read. Mostly because we don’t just fricking tell you what we WANT to say. For some reason we do this stupid guessing game thing and then get mad when you don’t even know what’s going on. Even I think its bullshit, yet I sometimes still do it; trust me, I’ve gotten a lot better. It’s hard to know why women are upset most times but asking is my best advice. Never accuse but just gently ask if she’s upset with you and why. Here are a few quick and commons reasons why she might be mad at you.

She’s on her period. Yes, it’s true; even though we deny it and get mad about your jokes, we really do hate out of spite. Just the thought that our time of the month is approaching is enough to set us off at anything you do. Hormones to blame or not, our monthly cycles get us in quite the rage and there isn’t much you can do to avoid it. No one said life was fair.

You aren’t helping enough. Doing chores around the house and running errands is a major part of your wife’s duties. Studies show that men who help out more with these things get more sex from their wives. A woman can feel tired and stressed after a day of caring for the kids, paying bills, doing household chores, and running around town doing errands. It really can feel like a full time job and if you just take the garbage out or do the dishes while she’s in the shower, she’ll definitely be mad less often.

Not enough time together. She may not even realize she’s mad at you for working too much or going out with the guys. Sometimes women don’t tell you they are mad because they don’t even know they are mad. It lurks deep in them and then gets let out in a fight. Make sure you’re giving her enough attention and not being overworked. You need time to help the relationship grow whether it is in the first year or the fortieth year.

Too much time together. To combat the previous statement, sometimes it’s the opposite. If you are together seemingly 24/7, besides when you’re at work, it can be overwhelming. If you have too much time together you can easily get on each other’s nerves and without knowing it, you will start to resent each other. Make sure she gets alone time for a bubble bath or wine night with the girls and that you take time to golf or watch the game with your friends.

Hopefully this helps you find out why she might be mad at you and what you can do to resolve it. Remember, sometimes she may not realize she’s acting mad and so asking nicely has its perks.

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Dirty Sex: Share a Kiss Full of Cum

Sex can be as extreme as you want it to be. Golden showers, domination, BDSM, the list goes on. While the former three may or may not be classed as dirty sex, any form of foreplay including the use of seminal fluids could well be one of the top ten in the dirty sex category. Seminal fluids contain pheromones, and if you’re filling her mouth up with cream, why then does it feel gross if she wants to kiss you with a mouth full of your white slime? I’ve experimented with this scene several times. Some of my ex lovers have felt no shame in tasting their own ejaculation, while others have point blankly refused. Great sex can often get messy.

I guess it’s the same with the smell of pussy, as if you’ve just gone down on her, made her cum, and your face is full of her sticky slime, but now you want to kiss her, she may feel repulsed by the smell. As a female, I find the scent of pussy to be very arousing. While I’ve had no lesbian fantasies, I would love to lick out a girl and make her cum. It must feel quite an achievement to make a woman come with your tongue. So I don’t mind when my boyfriend comes to kiss me with a mouth full of cum, and his face smelling of pussy.

I believe that we all have this “animal instinct” need to have dirty sex, and while it may take a while to manifest in some men and women, it comes easily to others. There is nothing to feel ashamed of in taking a partner aggressively. It can feel sexy for a woman to feel so wanted by a partner. You have to have her immediately, and even walking to the bedroom to have sex is too far to travel. Even hornier is for her to dominate you, throw you against the wall, pull down your trousers, and suck you until you explode hot cream over her face, only what if she still has the cum in her mouth, will you kiss her in the horny moment or still refuse? Often we need to take a chance to take sex to another level.

 

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Fisting: Hiding the Silent Duck

If a baby can squeeze out of a tiny vagina what would stop people from shoving their fist up there. Not much. Fisting is the sexual act of having someone do just that to the vagina and for some, even to the rectum…whuh?! This act is said to be pleasurable as the walls of the membrane stretch creating deep sensations which some report to be mind blowing. Others feel it is just another taboo induced orgasm. Additional terms for fisting include: fist-fucking, brachovaginal, and handballing.

How it’s Done

Basically you need a ton of lube to make sure the insertion is smooth and pain free. Insertion should be slow and actually NOT in the form of a fist but rather what has been termed as the ‘silent duck’. This is when you shape the hand to portray a duck’s beak and start beak first into the lube dripping pussy. After insertion, some enjoy the sensation of turning the silent duck into a fist while inside and slowly thrusting in and out. Seems like what it must have felt like for Catherine the Great to get banged by a horse.

Fisting Options

Fisting has often been associated with violence and degradation when in reality many people enjoy fisting as one of many hats to wear from their box-o-kink. It can be done alone or with a partner. Solo fisting is a little more difficult as it takes some dexterity to bend the wrist appropriately. In turn, when fully inserted it makes the ‘fistee’ look like some  deformed laboratory experiment.

Fisting Can Be Risky

Sure, it may feel good to a vagina or ass to be stretched open for all to see, but there are some real drawbacks that make this kink a potential health risk. For one, the chance of rupturing soft visceral tissue is high, especially on the micro level. Rupture means blood and blood means danger. Many fisting session participants will protect themselves with a latex or non-latex (some people are allergic) glove. Sometimes, people fist all the way up to their mid forearm. It is a sight of alien proportions. On top of micro-tears there is also the matter of stretching a hole so much that when you plunge into it with your cock it basically feels like you are fucking a glass of water.

Fisting Joke

A man pulls down his pants to show his friend a problem he is having with his asshole as it is the size of a salad plate. The friend says, “What the hell man?” The man says, “I got fucked by an elephant.” The friend says, “How could you? The elephant has a long thin penis.” The man says, “He fingered me first.”

You may want to think twice before you start going around fisting women (or yourself). Why make what’s tight not so right? Besides, there are plenty of other ways to get off. Try, role playing, spanking or even using a dildo for good old fashioned fun.

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Cosmic Ordering: Can you Order A Perfect Partner?

I know that it might sound strange that you can cosmic order a partner, but it is true. Did you know that the orgasm houses creative energy, so if you can visualize your partner during masturbation and feel happy and content just as you reach climax, you’ve already planted the seed with God or the Universe, and the vision must become real, according to the Law of Attraction.

In my case, cosmic ordering worked for me. I’ve always been happy single, but I often felt pressured to start dating just so that friends would get off my back, as single people are seen as the “desperate” people of society. So one night I experimented with cosmic ordering. While I was masturbating, I visualized running naked in a field with a skinhead. He was faceless, but very sexually spontaneous and set my loins on fire. I also requested that he be comfortable with my gregarious sexuality, that we share a wild chemistry, he be non-possessive and non-judgmental. I’ve never had a type of look in a man, but I always look for shared chemistry. I know this sounds like a lot to ask for in a man, but I wanted to find a soul mate, as I’d done the years of sleeping around, and while it felt good in the moment, there’s also the thought that I was disrespecting myself big willy style. It had to stop. I remained celibate for about a year and a half, but I still masturbated frequently and wrote about it on my blog.

When I met Jon, it was very spontaneous. It’s very strange that God or the Universe brought us together, since I had been given a business card by a man with the exact name as my current partner, six months prior to our meet. This I didn’t discover until I was sending Jon a box of goodies, and I saw the business card with his name, although his name was spelled in the traditional way. The synchronicity between us continue. Jon had asked if I could find him a UK number plate, and I found one on the ground with the registration G574 PWT and on the other side was BIG JON. The only thing I didn’t emphasize was where my soul mate would live.

How To Use Cosmic Ordering

  1. Firstly, you need to imagine how your partner is going to make you feel, as we all want a partner who makes us feel special and wanted.
  2. Don’t forget any aspect. You can be very specific about looks, personality, body shape, and height etc. Don’t forget about the location, or you might end up meeting your partner online and she could live thousands of miles away.
  3. Start stroking yourself and take advantage of the creative energy of the orgasm by implanting your perfect partner into the climax.
  4. The last part is patience. If you really want to meet someone and you are quite impatient then it can be easy to lose hope, but the Universe or God is lining up the perfect opportunity for you two to meet. Don’t give up hope.
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3 EASY Recipes to Impress Your Family

Some men just don’t belong in the kitchen, that’s a fact. You may have tried before and had it end in a near fire situation or have never once had the urge to get in there and TRY to make a meal or snack. But sometimes life gets busy for your kids and wife and you’re not the only one who doesn’t want to cook. A GREAT way to get brownie points with your wife and be a hero to your kids is to master just a few things in the kitchen. Below you will find a great snack, a quick Saturday lunch, and an easy dinner for the whole family. Enjoy these 3 easy recipes to impress your family and take the weight off of their shoulders.

Lunch. Sometimes making a quick Saturday lunch between raking the leaves and doing laundry can be an annoying task. Surprise your wife and secretly whip up some lunch for your family. You’ll need 1 package Pillsbury crescent rolls, 1 package hotdogs, cheese slices.

Preheat oven to 375. Lightly grease your baking sheet. Unroll the crescents and break apart at seams. Place cheese on the flattened dough and then add the hotdogs. Roll up each one then place in oven for about 15 minutes. Remove and serve with chips and dip.

Dinner. A quick easy dinner you can make to relieve some tension for your wife is chicken and rice. You’ll need two chicken breasts, 2 large cans of cream of chicken and white rice.
Preheat oven to 400. Cook chicken then cube or shred. Place in glass oven dish with cans of cream of chicken and stir. Cook for about 45 minutes. During the last 15 minutes make 2 cups of rice on the stove top. Serve chicken and soup mix over rice and enjoy!

Snack. A very simple and delicious snack will impress your family and leave you a hero! You’ll need pretzel squares, rolos, and pecans.
Place the pretzels on a cookie sheet and add a rolo on each one. Cook for about 5 minutes at 375. Rolos should not melt but be soft. Take out and gently push down a pecan or walnut on each one. Refrigerate to cool completely and serve!

These 3 easy recipes to impress your family will make you a king. Once you do these now and again you will gain brownie points and may even want to make some brownies!

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How to Tell if She is a He

Nowadays even the ugliest ass can look like the finest ass. The right makeup, clothes, perfume, hair and just about anything else deceiving can easily be put into action to reel you in. That is why it is important to approach ‘strange’ with open eyes so you can know how to tell if she is a he or not. Here are a few simple clues to help you spot a possible transgender blindside so you don’t go groping for a sweet female treat and end up with frank and beans instead.

Voice

A woman with a deep voice can easily make a man raise an eyebrow and look her way. It is usually sultry and sexy with real cock stiffening potential. However, now and again, if you listen real close you can sometimes hear the ever so faint male guttural grind that should get your ‘that’s-a-man’ meter spiking. Listen for anything that reminds you of how your crew talks and the he-she should be easy to spot.

Skin

If there is a shadow or it is real pock marked, those female steroids ain’t working.

Adam’s Apple

This thick thyroid cartilage that surrounds the larynx (voice box) is called the Adam’s Apple. Getting its name from the myth of a piece of the ‘forbidden fruit’ being stuck in Adam’s throat from the bible’s story of the Garden of Eden, it is prominent in most men but rarely seen in women. When you hear that hot blonde with the deep voice in the corner talking with her friends, look at her throat. If there is a fat, rolling Adam’s Apple front and center chances are there’s a fat rolling ‘something else’ between those legs.

Hands

Most women take care of their soft, cleanly manicured, long nailed hands that when they stroke your neck it is all you need to test the strength of your pant’s zipper. However, if she is a he posing as a she, those hands can be a dead giveaway. Look around at nearby guy hands (including your own), now look at the potential imposter. If they are short nailed, knobby, thick, veiny, scarred, short fingered and/or weather worn you just may have a sausage packer.

Boobs

There are two boob giveaways for the he-she set. One is the flat chest. If they did not decide to get some fake funbags and instead have a muscular little titty looking man chest it could be a bad sign. On the other hand, if those bad boys are tight and right with two hard nipples in sight, it could be deceiving. If fake ones are bouncing, you may have to add in the other factors to decipher if she’s a he.

Height

On average women do not stand above 5’7”-5’8”. When a man goes transgender the height can be hard to hide especially if is accompanied by broad shoulders.

Know how to tell if she is a he and the next time a tall, deep voiced, big or flat chested, thick handed, Adam’s Apple undulating, sweet looking babe saunters your way, look for the exit.

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Pheromones: Find a Sexually Compatible Mate Without Artificial Fragrance

Human pheromones are odorless, but they are found in urine, perspiration, and sexual fluids. They are detected through the vomeronasal organ (VMO) located in the mouth and nose. This is why we can feel an animal attraction to some partners, and not others. There have been a number of studies conducted on natural pheromones. 19 females and 16 males were given a t-shirt to wear containing no synthetic fragrance. 15 subjects were given a t-shirt to smell, and then asked to rate its scent on sexiness and pleasantness. An additional 22 men and women had to rate the physical attractiveness of the subjects who wore the t-shirts, and there was a correlation of sexiness and facial attractiveness in the body odor of females. The correlation of sexiness and facial attractiveness in the body odor of males only seemed to occur when females were in a fertile period (days 5 to 16 of the menstrual cycle).

Many of us mask our natural scent by using synthetic fragrance, which include body sprays and aftershave. This has put a halt to healthy mating, since most people are attracted to our “synthetic scent” rather than our natural scent. Pheromones are in charge of seeking a partner whom we are sexually compatible with. There is nothing wrong with smelling au natural, it can even be quite sexy to leave a little to the imagination.

Use Pheromones to Seduce a Partner

Using pheromones to seduce a partner can be especially effective if you are in a long distance relationship. Use a small cloth to wipe your armpits, penis after a piss, and of course spray your cum all over it. Wait for it to dry and it will develop a unique scent. Send this to a partner as a horny treat. It may sound gross to go to such demands, but society makes a massive deal about smelling good to attract a partner, but it has clearly forgotten that the body has a natural way of attracting prey. Animals have no problem in seeking a sexual partner, so why have humans been drawn so far apart from such a natural process? Going au natural has turned into a case of bad body odor, but why do we feel more attracted to women at the gym? Primarily, it is down to our pheromones working on overdrive.

Pheromone Spray

The manufacturers of pheromone spray will tell us that, unfortunately, the body does not produce enough pheromones of its own to attract a mate. This is bullshit! If only the body were given a chance to produce its magic potion. Over cleansing the body can remove natural pheromones, but staying clean has been drilled into our brains. There is no chance of us meeting a partner if we smell even slightly sweaty, so we overcompensate with strong aftershaves. Even shower gels are laden with artificial fragrance. It seems like there is no escape. In essence, pheromones sprays are also synthetic, although there are many manufacturers claiming that they contain human pheromones.

However, it is easy to go au natural and give your pheromones a chance. Forget what other people think. You have more chance of finding a sexually compatible partner if you let your pheromones work for you.

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When It’s Time To Get A New Job

Well it’s true that no one likes their job, but what if you REALLY HATE IT? There are some of us who just get depressed at the thought of another Monday and going “back to the grind”. Sometimes there really is a difference between not enjoying work and truly loathing what you do for a living. Maybe it’s your boss, your hours, your co-workers, or something else, but you need to do a lot of thinking before you make the bold move to transition. Here’s how to know when it’s time to get a new job for good.

First: Ask yourself why you hate your job so much. Find out what makes it so horrible. Is your boss an asshat? Is your route to work long and grueling? Do you feel worthless selling door-to-door? Dig in and see why you dislike it. Then, once you do find out whether or not that will change at a new job. What if your next boss is even worse? What if next time you get put on midnights every other weekend? Are you okay with the unknown of a new job? No job is perfect so just make sure that the troubles you have are just at this job and won’t follow you elsewhere.

Secondly: Ask how much your job is affecting you negatively. Are you stressed, unable to sleep, easily agitated, or depressed? If you are any of the above and directly attribute it to your work situation, this is serious cause for concern. No job should leave you feeling empty or sad in your everyday life. This will harshly affect your family and personal life, altering who you are. Ask what would make you happy in your next career and start with that.

Thirdly: If you find out that you indeed would be happier with a change, make sure that you FIND ANOTHER JOB FIRST. This is very crucial. You cannot collect unemployment if you quit and it could take months to find a new start. You need to search for a new career or position while you’re at the one you’re currently at. Make sure you don’t waste your time with a bad resume. Update all your info and even have it professionally looked at.

Fourthly: If your family agrees that you should also move on, then it’s time. When you’ve done all the things listed above you are more than likely ready to move forward with a job elsewhere.

When it’s time to get a new job you’ll feel it. Just make sure you take all the necessary precautions and do it with ease and care. Also leave your current job on a good note for future reference… even if it’s killing you not to kick your boss in the nuts on the way out!

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Raunchy Drink Recipes: Demand a Wild Ride

Having a get together with beer and wine is okay but why not spice up the night with some raunchy drink recipes. Send out an invite advertising a party featuring only these sexed up libations. They will excite the brain cells and have ‘em all laughing each time they order. It will surely be a party for the books, so go get the ingredients, throw clean sheets on the bed, get a few sleeves of prime prophylactics and set up the bar.

Open Says Me

1 oz Tequila
1 oz vodka
1 oz gin
1 oz rum

Simply mix this one in a glass and after she downs two she’ll let you put a leash on her pussy so you can walk it into your bedroom.

Sex on My Face

1/2 oz Canadian whisky
1/2 oz coconut rum
1/2 oz peach liqueur
1/2 oz banana liqueur
1 splash cranberry juice
1 splash pineapple juice
1 splash orange juice

Shake vigorously and have handed to the hottest babe in the room. Make sure she knows who sent it and what it is called. Who knows, she just may straddle your pie hole before the night is through.

Blue Balls

1 oz raspberry vodka
1 oz coconut rum
1 oz Blue Curacao liqueur

Add one after the other into a shaker and jump start with three or four quick vibrations, pour two shots, place by your crotch and ask a kind woman for some help.

Screaming Orgasm

1 oz vodka
1 1/2 oz Irish cream
1/2 oz coffee liqueur

Send each one over ice and gently stir. Do not use cheap vodka here as it will curdle the Irish cream and before you have a chance to give her a screaming orgasm you’ll be handing her a yeast infection in a glass.

The Blow Job

1/2 oz anisette
1/2 oz Irish cream

Pour the anisette first then top with the Irish cream and give to her as a hint.

Ass

1 oz vodka
1 splash Sour Apple Pucker schnapps

This is a shot glass of vodka with a splash of schnapps to create a burn and pucker reaction. Get it?

Suck, Bang & Blow!

1 oz orange flavored gin
1 oz peppermint liqueur
2 oz cinnamon schnapps
1 oz Yager
3 oz gold tequila
1 oz vodka
1 oz Citron vodka
1 oz triple sec
1 peeled, whole lime
5 oz strawberry daiquiri mix
2 cups cranberry juice
1 cup sugar

Blend it with ice and pour the froth in a fat glass. Throw in a straw and watch her eyes glaze over in no time. Then tell her the name and she just might.

Slippery Bald Beaver

1/2 oz butterscotch schnapps
1 oz Irish cream
1/2 oz strawberry puree

Shake on ice and ask if anyone is interested in proving their clean, sheen for a free glass.

These raunchy drink recipes are just what you need to get the party wet and wild. Once all have had their share, sex will saturate the air.

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Why Women Love Facebook

Have you found yourself irritated with your spouse or girlfriend lately? Does she spend too much time on Facebook and the internet in general? Is it a big deal to her if you talk to her through Facebook and not just in person? Well there are very many different reasons your woman is addicted. Here are some main reasons why women love Facebook so much. Maybe this guide will help you find out if there’s a way to fix it or if you’re doomed.

Reason One: Attention. Let’s face it, women love attention. So much that they are willing to find it from complete strangers online. The fad of uploading mirror pictures or “selfies” isn’t going away soon. You can try to give her more attention but there is also a part of women who will always need attention from other men no matter what. Somehow, knowing that a stranger finds you attractive validates their self-worth and makes them happy.

Reason Two: Bragging. Bragging or “one-upping” friends is another reason women love FB. Getting to show off how much she’s accomplished is easy and fun to do online. Again, this all steams from “attention getting”. Girls like to slyly show that they have a great boyfriend, marriage, cute kids, a good job, lots of friends, etc. to girls they hate. It makes them feel good to know that a female they don’t like could be jealous of their posts and all their “happiness” in life. A way to remedy this is to try and make sure she is TRULY happy; a lot of “over-showmanship” comes from self-doubt and insecurity. When a woman is TRULY happy, she will tend to brag even less believe it or not.

Reason Three: Boredom. You may need to spice things up at home if you want her off of good ole FB. Women tend to stay online and surf the internet and places like Pinterest when there’s nothing better to do. Try and take her out of the house more. Play cards at home and get her out of the way of the blinding screen. Go for a jog, go out for a drink, or hit the gym more often. The more active a lifestyle you lead, the less she’ll have time for it.

These are just a few of the reasons she loves to be on Facebook She also loves when you post on her wall because all of her friends and family can SEE how sweet you are instead of her having to TELL them. There is something about proof in writing over her just bragging about you when you’re not there. Hopefully this helps you understand better why women love Facebook so damn much!

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Butea Superba: Treat Impotence and Erectile Dysfunction

There will always be a vast number of male enhancement products that promise to increase penis size, enhance pleasure, prolong an erection and rid performance anxiety. Butea Superba is a herbal aphrodisiac that is proven to treat impotence and erectile dysfunction. A study proved that men were able to gain and maintain an erection more easily, erections were easier to sustain after sex, men were able to produce more ejaculate, and the herb supports regular erections.

Butea Superba is available as a gel, which is applied to the penis regularly to treat impotence and erectile dysfunction. The chemical properties of Butea Superba are similar to the herb, Puerania Mirifica. While Butea Superba provides effects similar to Viagra, it offers none of the chemical overload produced by the infamous blue pill.

How Does Butea Superba Work?

After application, Butea Superba indicates a sexual response in the brain. The nerve signals of the penis are connected to the spinal chord. The cavernosal nerves release nitric oxide, which penetrates the muscle cells to form the penis’ spongy tissue. From there, Cyclic Guanine Mono Phosphate is produced, which relaxes the body and causes blood to rush to the penis, resulting in a strong erection. In essence, Butea Superba does everything that a well functioning penis would do in normal circumstances.

Why Does Impotence or Erectile Dysfunction Occur?

The result of impotence or erectile dysfunction can be caused through alcoholism, obesity, lacking in self-esteem, smoking, drug taking or general stress. It can be pretty debilitating to be unable to perform in the bedroom, especially when you are already feeling under pressure in every other area of your life. Butea Superba takes a little of this stress away, as it will cause an erection, even if you don’t feel in the mood for sex.

How To Use Butea Superba?

Butea Superba is available as both a gel and a pill. The manufacturer will supply specific instructions for use, and it is up to you to follow this advice, for best effects. It doesn’t have to be a long-term fix; rather a short-term investment to get your penis back in motion so that you can share a fulfilling sex life once against with a partner.

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Tips on How to Make Your Relationship Work Better

You may have played grueling sports, excelled in challenging business ventures, achieved some of the highest honors but when it comes to dating or living with a woman, this may be the hardest thing you have ever done yet. These tips on how to make your relationship work better just might be what you need in your back pocket when you are ready to ditch it all.

The 90 Second Rule

All it takes is 90 seconds three times per day to keep her in your corner. According to Jim Fannin, expert advisor to CEO’s and couples alike, when you show a woman that she is your number one priority she will respond. Take 90 seconds in the morning to let her know you love her with a firm hug and kind words. At the end of the day when you re-connect after work, gauge her mood within another 90 seconds of undivided attention. If she approaches you with a smile and good energy return it, if she is grumpy or sad try to empathize with that as well. If you are sleeping together use 90 seconds before sleep to have ‘pillow talk’. Exclude kids, work or the past but rather listen to anything she is currently feeling to let her know you are there.

Reel in Your Comments

Men are notorious for under breath comments and over time when women hear enough of them it can create a huge strain. Making negative comments is like a sucker punch to sensitive female feelings so when you cannot control letting her know she is wrong, stop it in its tracks in your head. It all comes down to the golden rule, “If you do not have something nice to say, do not say anything.”

Look in the Mirror

If you have fallen into ‘relationship complacency’ then you will want to re-vamp how you may have let yourself go. Whether it is your weight, wardrobe or whining if you look in the mirror and see a completely different person than the one she originally met, it is high time to get back to the kinder, gentler, better looking you.

Change with Change

Many couples that breakup often comment on how each person just ‘grew apart’. More often than not it is one person that embraces change while the other stays stuck in the past. If you or she seems to be moving into new territories of experience either bring her along, join her or simply be encouraging. The minute you furrow your brown and stamp your feet is the minute you both begin to separate.

These tips on how to make your relationship work better can go a long way. It is up to you to try them and add to them so you do not have to start over with someone else who has just as much baggage as the one before.

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How to Survive Rough Financial Family Times without Fighting

The economy still seems just as bad as it was 5 years ago to most people in middle and lower classes and unfortunately no one for sure knows when this will end; there is no clear light at the end of the tunnel in sight. With that being said, the struggles that most families are facing because of this are affecting their personal lives so much that it is ending in heartache and divorce. Money has always been a top issue amongst married couples and is even more so now that times are tough. But there are ways to find out how to survive rough financial family times without fighting and here are a few of them.

Communication is the key. First and foremost you want to make sure that you and your wife are talking everyday about the finances, even if you spend 15 minutes looking at the bills together or discussing what bill you should pay next. Communication doesn’t have to be just about the finances but about your relationship in general. You need to keep an open format of dialogue to see how the other person is holding up. Make sure you let her know when you are stressed and ways she can help and vice versa. Making sure you never yell or get into an argument is the most effective way to handle this.  Be adults and know you are both in this TOGETHER, not against each other.

Having a plan is crucial. IGNORING the problems will NOT make them go away. You need to face your troubles head first and start planning. What bills have the highest interest rates, what bills can you ask the government to help with, which ones can be easily paid off first? Planning out together and agreeing on a step by step ladder to get you out will be beneficial. You must write everything down so you don’t argue about this later. Be clear on what the plan is and you can refer back to notes later to avoid fighting about what was said and who is right or wrong.

Help each other. You are in a marriage not some high school romance; chances are you even have kids together and so you need to be a team and stay strong. Remember you vowed to stay in this for better or worse and now is time to test those vows. Try and stay calm and never shout. Also, help each other find a job! Be a force TOGETHER and lend a hand to your wife on her resume, drive her to interviews, pep talk her up. Have her help you work on interview skills or find ways you can use your handyman skills to earn side money on the weekends. Either way you must never go against each other and find ways to compromise and do this as a couple not as singles.

How to survive rough financial family times without fighting is tricky and stressful but not impossible. Just remember why you fell in love and that your hard work will be paid off. There is hope and it is a lot stronger when you are working as a team.

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Get a Bigger Penis: Do Male Enhancement Techniques Work?

Studies have indicated that the average penis size is approximately 5.1 to 5.9 inches long, and anything larger is a plus! The best way to measure your penis size is when it’s erect. Measure from the base of the penis to the tip with a tape measure or ruler. To measure the circumference of your penis, wrap a piece of string around the penis and then transfer this string to a tape measure or ruler. Penis enhancement surgery is often the most effective way to get a bigger penis, but there are others.

The size of a penis can vary greatly, so a very small flaccid penis may increase favorably when erect, compared to a penis that is already large when flaccid and only increases by an inch or two when erect. It was often believed that men with big feet had a bigger than average penis, but there are no studies to support this belief. However, three studies have shown that a long index finger can indicate a larger than average penis size.

The penis continues to grow up to the age of 21, so if you are not happy with your size, it may be time to accept this fact, or opt for surgery or other tools that can help you get a bigger penis.

Enhancement Techniques

  • Penis Pumps: There is no evidence to suggest that a penis pump will help you get a bigger penis, but training the whole body will increase your sexual confidence.
  • Sex Pills: Cialis and Viagra will not enhance your penis size, but they will sustain an erection for several hours. This treatment is perfect for anxious men who have sexual inhibitions.
  • Penis Enlargement Surgery (Phallophasty): Although this method is an effective way to get a bigger penis, it is also expensive and painful.
  • Butea Superba: This herbal gel is thought to treat sexual problems, including erectile dysfunction. When used repeatedly, it claims to give stronger, longer erections. However, this comes at a price, as this product costs around $45.00 per 100 ml tube.

Use Your Hands to Get a Bigger Penis

Why use a penis pump or opt for penis enlargement surgery when you can get a bigger penis with the help of your hands? The penis contains strong muscles, so it is only natural to use masturbation to increase its strength several times a day. When the penis is flaccid, stretch it downward several times, which will lengthen the structure and ensure its growth. When your penis is erect, massage and stroke the penis upward. You may notice an improvement in size after several months of consistent effort.

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Marijuana: Best Cooking Technique

Smoking weed is so 2010, now everyone is vaping and eating their brains into oblivion instead. Sure, a tasty rolled up spliff is a great old-school fallback but vaporizing and/or chowing down a green infused recipe gets you there cleaner, healthier and higher. Vaporizing is fairly easy but cooking takes some talent so lay down your next hit, put on a fluffy white hat, and start getting all baker-like with this marijuana cooking technique.

The Secret Ingredient

Many feel that using butter is the best way to extract THC (tetrahydrocannabinol, the compound responsible for your skull fry) from marijuana. However, butter has all sorts of dirty potential as it can burn easier, contains antibiotics fed to the cow and leaves a slimy residue in your mouth after eating. The secret ingredient is virgin coconut oil. The ‘virgin’ label means it was made from fresh coconut meat and processed without chemicals. Although it can be high in saturated fat, coconut oil has been linked to weight loss, healthy skin, improved thyroid health and lowering LDL cholesterol.

Extraction

The only way to extract THC is to enable it to bind to fat molecules. Here is the recipe for creating the perfect extraction:

• Fill a small or medium pot with about three or four cups of water and bring to a boil.

• Scoop three or four heaping table spoons of virgin coconut oil into the boiling water and stir until melted.

• Add a half or full cup of marijuana to the boiling formula.

• Reduce the flame and let simmer for at least an hour (longer extracts more). Stir and add water as the boiling water evaporates so nothing burns.

• Let cool.

Preparation

You will need a cheese cloth, a rubber band and a medium size glass container with a lid. A cheese cloth can be found in most supermarkets. Stretch the cloth over the glass container and secure around the edges with the rubber band. Gently push down on the cloth making an indent deep enough to hold, but not spill, what will be poured into it. Pour in the boiled formula and leftover wet marijuana. Gently undo the rubber band, pull the cheese cloth up and together and squeeze the excess liquid out of the marijuana into the container. Throw away the cheese cloth and marijuana, secure the lid on the container and refrigerate overnight.

The Prize

The next morning open your container. The coconut oil should be separated from the water and now a solid block that looks like wax floating on top. Pop it out, rinse it off, discard the excess water from the container, wrap the coconut in plastic and freeze.

You now have the perfect THC infused cooking oil. Whenever you need oil to cook or bake, simply heat and reduce the coconut back to oil and put it into the mix. Try adding to sugar cookie batter and eating the batter, your head will explode. Remember, consumed marijuana has a much longer lasting high.

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